Published On:Saturday, July 7, 2012
Posted by abg man
Dating Jewish Men - The BIG Myth About Meeting And Marrying Jewish (If You're NOT Yourself)
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Q: Do Jewish men only marry Jewish women? Is there a stigma about dating, or having a relationship with a non Jew? Is it illegal, immoral or unethical to intermarry if you are Jewish? In this article we are going to tackle one of the more common myths about meeting and marrying Jewish men if you are NOT Jewish yourself, as well as discuss some simple truths you really ought to know as well.
Curious to know more? Continue reading as we take a closer look below!
Filed Under: Is Intermarriage Frowned On in the Jewish Faith?
Honestly? As an overall cultural conversation... in a traditional sense, it sort of is. Historically, because Jews, like other minority groups are self conscious about our size (as a population, that is!) inter-marrying or assimilation has traditionally been discouraged.
That said, of course that is changing as the world grows increasingly diverse and dating opportunities open up in cross cultural ways that would NOT have been so common in previous generations.
Remember, much like Italians, Irish and other traditional minority groups who immigrated en masse to the US about 50 or 60 years ago... most Jews would meet, mingle and marry people who lived in their own small, "segregated" communities and neighborhoods.
As the world has changed over the last few decades, especially here in the US... so TOO have the rates of intermarriage and it's acceptability to the broader culture.
As a matter of fact, while I'd be LYING to say there isn't still a stigma attached to intermarriage, it's less an issue today, than ever before.
Some recent published statistics suggest that about 30-35% of all Jewish men would have no problem marrying a non Jewish woman, and closer to HALF say that love, not religion is the most important factor in choosing a mate.
Does that mean that there are no problems for couples who intermarry?
Absolutely not, and this is where the problem may lie. While most Jews in the US, for example are NOT religious and don't actively practice the faith, most would prefer to raise their children with some Jewish culture and customs. Where this becomes difficult is when kids enter the picture and there are religious or customary conflicts between the 2 people... and of course, it's MUCH easier for children to choose the more popular and practiced religion than the minority one.
The bottom line?
If you are are non Jewish woman and have a thing for Jewish men... the idea that you'll have a lot of difficulty meeting one is a BIG myth. There are many thousands of happy marriages between members of all kinds of different religions... and like everyone else, Jewish men regularly meet (and marry) Muslims, Christians, Buddhists and everything in between. Are there additional challenges when cultures and customs are different? Yes, probably so. But you never know until you try - and if you are attracted to a specific community or culture, my best advice is to go for it, and see what happens!
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